God will accept everything about you but the one thing He won’t take is the blame
Actually marr– iage is like riding a tan– dem unicycle
A mind without a body, Say one that’s been uploaded to th… Is like a thought without words– You can picture it But it’s senseless
The never-ending apocalyptic refra… may just be yet another version of death’s denial: The world must be ending
“Democracy is the worst form of go… Except for all those other forms t… Since all other forms involve deat… And democracy merely involves symb… But democracy has an illness
When I caught my wife cutting up… she said it was to prevent birds getting stuck in them like six-pac…
Everyone who uses language believes in God Prayer is the act of admitting that you believe in God
When I got my first honey-do list after the wedding I explained to my bride that I us… until I was bitten by one of the 5… that don’t make webs
You must go on. I can’t go on. I’ll ramble on.
A long time ago I received my mission statement: The best version of myself isn’t t… I’m currently on my ten thousandth… Trying to figure out what this mea…
It’s hard to quantify change We keep running our equations Adding and subtracting everything… From everything we know about God And the numbers don’t add up–
There’s equality And there’s e-quality You know the former when you see i… You know the latter when it sees y…
We’ve got enough to go on That there’s enough for everybody So long as we are tough enough But we couldn’t leave well enough… And soon enough
If a tree falls in the forest and your husband is there does it make a sound
What do you call it when people are so bored that they start playing with fire and soon enough find themselves fighting fire with fire
