17/01/17
theres torment living within me
distracted and busy for long enough
I do not see.
But in stillness the truth of me burns
my torment digs in its heels
more driven than me and
unrelenting
Urging me to set me free
burning me for not having the courage
I ask for freedom and to do some good
yet faced with uncomfortable wished
I turn and run
and look to the path I know
the one that offers no hope, no love, no inner truth
Is it easier to face a slow, soul numbing path
than to liberate myself?
When I’m not even sure i can do it
When I’ve said so long that i want to help
but maybe only if its comfortable,
maybe only if its helping myself?
And I’m sure it would small
and surely make no difference at all
And maybe i’d still just be right fucking here
So small, so small
and I know it would make no difference to my life at all
and its only words
But why do I feel the need to share?
Do i actually believe anyone else would care?
Unquenchable ache
how to live with only whats before me?
When I feel the Eternity the Iam
when I feel the Eternity that WE are
This is just another piece
this is not the choice offered me
My choice is what to do with what I face
with the Life presented me
Lies will not defeat me
Eyes closed and still Eternity resides within me
Blind and bound, I AM still
Hollowed and withered, I REMAIN
Nothing can make the Truth a lie
no one can take Truth away
Even after every defeat, every warped manipulation,
every twisted thought imbedded upon my heartsoul
Truth IS
I REMAIN
and if my heart hears my words yearning to be set free
Then pray I find the courage and egoless space to comply
Oh dear, sweet heart
I must try
I must
Im so scared and unsure why?
(Is it perhaps that my madness would be known?
Is it that no one would care?
Is it everything I dare not expose?
Is it where I’m safe becoming not so?)
