We’ve Saved All Your Files on Cloud 9, by Chris Gaither

Chris Gaither

We’ve Saved All Your Files on Cloud 9

Denial was a lot easier

when your head was in the clouds

but your memories were

stored on microfiche

Other works by Chris Gaither...

The Truth Hurts Because It Sets You Free and the Truth Is That the Image of Hell as an Inferno of Torment Is a Lie; Hell Is the Most Comfortable Place on Earth

I was voluntold to make myself sca… But scarcely do they realize In pretending to give me a choice They have unwittingly given me an… Truth or dare?

Maybe This Is Rock Bottom

Wittgenstein let the fly out of the bottle but western philosophy was soon back on the bottle

You Can’t Win a Shouting Match but the Side With More Likes and Shares Loses

It’s all over but for the shouting and this is the shouting

“I don’t cook; I warm”

I trusted the process It wrought processed food I’m still processing

Let’s Have a Laugh at Our Own Expense, Since God Has Furnished Our Expense Account

The difference between the walking… And the walking dead Is what they have in common– The walking wounded can laugh at t… And the walking dead can only laug…

Haiku

I thought I’d crafted a mystique when all I’d rea– lly made were mistakes

Lay It on Me

It’s not about you; It’s about me– This is how you know She’s breaking up with you It’s not about you;

“I’d Like to Help You in Your Struggle to Be Free”

A wise man once told me When you don’t know what to do do nothing A wise politician

This Is Just a Phase We’re Going Through

We pass through birth, life, and death like H2O phasing through ice, water, and steam so yes

And the Winner Is

The worst part about giving every kid in little league a trophy is the way it has emptied all the… out of acquiring

We’ll All Pay With Our Lives

Yes, humans suck– that’s a universal The reason we haven’t been able to fix it is that being a human doesn’t suck for eve…

No Perspective

The screen you’re looking at seven hours a day is actually a magnifying glass

Take It or Grieve It

It’s not that I’ve often taken leave of my senses but that I can never take a hint

A Culture of Death Never Speaks of Death; We Just Say It’s Gone to Committee

A planning committee’s second most… Is coming up with a plan That everyone can agree to But no one is happy with This sounds strange until you real…

Desire Makes a World of Difference

When God says Do what you want He knows You’re going to anyway His risk is betting you want