Some people say They were born too late; I was almost born too soon But then along came the internet Just in time to stop time–

2/3 of the Earth Is covered by water So, most of the underground Is under water Accordingly, in dreams

God already knows Where this is all going But it’s up to all of us How we get there

Life used to be hard And that’s how we liked it So much that we used to say Hurry up and wait In the understanding that

Everyone knows it could go either way but no one believes it could have gone either way So we tell ourselves

The universe is always asking By chance, do you have a creative…

People keep repeating the same mis… Until they learn their lesson But what if the lesson is that History repeats itself? If you’ve skimmed your Nietzsche

In a post-pandemic bid to remain relevant the SATs have removed all true/false questions in acknowledgment that such questi…

Imagine the disappointment when we… both wearing Velcro singlets but each fashioned from the softer… with nary a hook between us

I won’t rest ‘til O– prah puts me on the cover of her magazine

A people pleaser pretends to live in Youtopia but really resides in Myopia because all he can see is what he needs from you

If new car smell lasts forever you will not be able to smell it

I was a bullshit artist until I realized a career as a bullshit scientist paid better

The truth is always at a disadvant… because while you can harness truth in service of a lie you can’t tell lies

Because we are social beings whenever people said they have no… they always meant they have no soc… Real life was social life But now social life is short for