Yes, humans suck– that’s a universal The reason we haven’t been able to fix it is that being a human doesn’t suck for eve…
From where I was situated There was no room to maneuver In the situation room And everybody else found themselve… In the same situation
It was an offer I thought I couldn’t refuse: You can sit there and take it Or leave it Having nowhere to go
Upon my retirement I thought to myself Maybe now I can get some work don…
The Declaration of Independence w… revised to guarantee life, security and the pursuit of criminals
TaB Clear whose only selling point was its clearness was offered exclusively in aluminum cans
What I lack in subtlety I make up for in volume
Everyone wants to drive a wedge between the monotheists and the Da… when the only real difference is that the former believe this land was made for you and me
There are two kinds of people in t… Those who believe in God And those who believe in God But also believe in God You can tell the latter
What do all apples have in common? It only takes one rotten apple to… Because all apples are unique But a mob of apples are uniquely b…
You can never be happy with what you have; on– ly with what you lack
To break up with your significant other just say I need space To break it off
You will only find happiness when the answers to the questions What would you do if you knew you… and What would you do if you knew you…
When I run out of things to do I write an itinerary: When all else fails fill sandbags to convert
Love may never win but love always ties
