Much like nuclear weapons the whole point of having vacation days is never to use them
The number one cause of divorce Is holding a grudge We are divorced from reality Because we hold a grudge against t… We resent the truth
She went to law school; I bet it all on brick ov– en pita and lost
I brought a wife To a gun fight Don’t worry You haven’t met my wife
In France everyone thinks Scotch tape is crap
Consider the vowel: In Marxism, the last shall remain… as the second A in materialism always becomes the second E in mat… And in capitalism, of course
All men come with self-destruct bu… If he seems to be missing one, you’re the button
I thought I’d crafted a mystique when all I’d rea– lly made were mistakes
It takes guts to admit you don’t belong but it’s easy to read a sign that says No admission
When space is finite we need to share which is colloquially known as using the Force When cyberspace is infinite
In all my years as warden I could never figure out how to co… with NFPA code 14.14.1.5.1- “Access to exits shall be marked b… readily visible signs in all cases…
Lao Tse said of the Tao that “You can use it any way you want” Jacques Lacan further insisted th… you should only use it the way you… when he said
God: Do you trust me? Me: It’s not my fault!
After that instead of talking about the weath… or staring at their phones people stared at anyone who talked
Life used to be hard And that’s how we liked it So much that we used to say Hurry up and wait In the understanding that
