Most people can get away with sweeping a few things under the ru… but when I started working at the… I couldn’t help noticing how the rugs looked like
Happy me, happy precis: Happy wife, happy life
It never snows anymore in Baltimore but it did before you left open the refrigerator doo…
I try to imagine what it was like for my wife when two lines meant positive and the closest I get is when
Like a real life Picture of Dorian Gray my hair stays full even as my act wears thin
You have to believe to commit And they think we’re crazy to beli… And would commit us as inpatients If only they had the patience But their patience has worn thin
A fair competition Is one in which No one can win So that everyone Has an equal chance
As the Zamboni driver erasing everything that just happe… so it can all happen again I am preparing for my own death
I can’t get no satisfaction except self-satisfaction and I pity the fool who would want that
The closest I ev– er came to forming Voltron was using Groupon
The prevailing mood was that of a nuclear submarine having failed to deter Armageddon
If you start with being, then Being is meaningless But meaning is never without being Because meaning always comes first
Hook-up apps have given intimacy all the allure of an oil change
Just because we’re not in control Doesn’t mean we’re out of control The rest is commentary
What if I could just do no wrong Then surely, I’d still get to bel… Perforce, I did nothing And found myself bluffing Whenever I needed to be strong
