10:43 pm
people have hurt me. taken advantage and made me feel unsafe. you have never harmed me, so why does it bother me so much
i wonder if i cross your mind i wonder of thoughts of me creep u… and whisper in your ear i wonder if you take a second glan… at my name when i call
i feel... “okay” really that means i’ve been dissoc… it means distracted it means ignoring what upsets me it means crying less,
it is so incredibly draining to feel so passionless. i just want to feel useful interesting
i crave your touch trace my bones caress my skin hold me close never let me go
tear me limb from limb turn me to dust my life impacts no one why do i exist? i am disappointing
i don’t want to ruin your night i don’t want to always seem broken always bringing you sadness that y… soon you will be tired of it i am not as fun or interesting as…
always been taught to prioritize other people’s pain over my own trained selfish if i speak about myself at… supposed to normalize anger
i cannot rest my heavy eyes due to… and no matter how hard i try and t… you’re always there laughing as if you belong if only you’d visit me in the fles…
jotting down my thoughts trying to make sense of it all shaking hands stiff fingers i cannot even self soothe anymore
my mind is loud tonight, i am struggling to sift through it… overwhelmed by every detail. feel like i don’t exist feel like i am replaceable
same old patterns, willing to give my love away. but what’s the shame in that? yes it hurts - never quite reciprocated -
i love you more than i ever though… you fell into my life when i didn’t expect a thing you fell into my life when i needed you most
if i died in my room, whether it were an accident or int… how long would it take for you to… everything is about you, you, you so where does that leave me?
i have weeds growing from my skin i am one with earth and still feeling unnatural i sit, water pours i am blooming