We went from wearing galoshes over… to wearing galoshes over our shoes… to wearing galoshes as shoes and now we wear galoshes over galo…

It wasn’t false modesty exactly You might call it un-unpretentious if you were being pretentious

The most hellish aspect of hell is how some of the people there don’t mind it at all

When I started telling my employe… Apologies in advance! they still felt compelled by decor… No apologies needed which was how I ended exploitation

The rise in sales of cruelty-free products exactly tracks the increased rate at which its consumers visit cruelty upon

It’s hard to quantify change We keep running our equations Adding and subtracting everything… From everything we know about God And the numbers don’t add up–

To avoid road rage all rearview mirrors have been replaced by screens displaying a real-time computerize… of the way things ought to be

If a computer could speak we could not understand it

Question: What do you want the mo… Answer: The most. This is how you know The devil is always cheating you Because desire is neither

Your mind Is playing a trick on you And you are the trick But since all healing Is a form of getting over yourself

Our lightweight cat litter develop… hit a speed bump when we realized it was worth its weight in gold

Most lives are lived in service to one institution or another but only very recently has this begun to feel

Because a man is only as good as h… you’ll know he means what he says when you see him do it But on social media a man is only his words

In an earthly alternative to astro… We each get our own distinct Tree… And mine is a Pacific silver fir Another word for which is Amabilis

Materialism is no way out of Cartesian dualism It just turns backwards– I am, therefore I think– in an infinite regress