We got the five day work week because that’s how long it takes a python to digest it’s meal

The baton is a scroll that says– among other things– The road goes on forever Heaven is

In a twist in hell there are no consequences

Losing what you never had is only possible when you look for it exactly where it never was

If the soul is eternal then self-overcoming more than becoming who you really… is becoming who you always were It’s like peeling away

Poets are to their poems As parents are to their children Preparing them for the world Without knowing what they will do

Relationships are hard work unless you’ve preemptively announc… that you’re quitting but staying on as a volunteer

I’ll never forget when a guy standing in his front yard confronted me about looking into parked car windows mistaking me for a car thief

In the new version of Heads I win, tails you lose People hate to be wrong But love to apologize And if you accept their apology

There’s no time like the present as we now reside outside of time inside a stalled clockworks as useless cogs in the rundown machine

I always liked making people laugh until my undergraduates told me that it was an abuse of power asym…

The answer man is left with a ques… What does a woman want? The question woman is stuck with a… A good man is hard to find but eas…

A man starts out lying for instant gratification Inevitably, this progresses to buy… his unending rationalizations

We used to worry about selling out; now we’re terrified of not buying in

Why do we say Where there’s smoke, there’s fire when It’s the smoke that kills you, not…