One party rule Finally clicked in America When the ruling party rebranded As the Pajama Party
The prevailing mood was that of a nuclear submarine having failed to deter Armageddon
You’re only truly clever When the devil says “Live forever If only from God you’ll sever” And you reply “Never For God is always my lever
Sex is like The world’s most powerful wild ani… And we are to ride it Since it is the only force strong… For the building and maintenance o…
Pacifism is the ultimate weapon For if you can prohibit your enemy From defending himself Then all that’s left Is to love him to death
You will only find happiness when the answers to the questions What would you do if you knew you… and What would you do if you knew you…
There was a time when fools managed perceptions in order to manage reality, realists managed perceptions because they couldn’t manage reali…
The only colleges left standing will be the ones that can make you look smart while you’re playing dumb
A funny thing happened when I told them that you can either laugh or you can cr… No one laughed but for a second
According to Exxon Mobil absolute solar power corrupts absolutely
We spend most of our waking lives alternating between procrastinatio… and delayed gratification as if by putting things off we’ve bought ourselves more time
Whistler’s mother had just spent a long day with Whis– tler’s mother-in-law
Just as He covered 2/3 of the Ear… God made us each 2/3 water To make it obvious But not too obvious That we don’t ever die
All cars have always been getaway cars because they tell the world how much you’re getting away with but now all cars are SUVs
It feels like I’m writ– ing an unauthorized au– tobiography
