I’m staring up in the sky in the middle of October the wind blowing through my hair and the tears rolling down my face as I ask the world why oh why does my life have to be so hard  I think of the memories that make me who I am and it makes me sad, angry and sick to know I stooped so low in the past I have hurt my family and my friends and the people I cared about in one point of my life I cry myself to sleep thinking of my mom, my sisters and brothers wife and two children I left without my wisdom and love so I think why could I not have that white pick it fence instead of these ugly steal bars surrounding me .......