When life gives you A bottomless pit Fill it with Bottomless fries

We used to worry about selling out; now we’re terrified of not buying in

Inasmuch as handling gold is always a thorny affair all gold is rose gold but black gold

Every night when Smokey Bear would tuck me in… the last thing he always said was Only you can prevent forest fires

In comic books Superheroes assume a secret identi… In order to fool others So they can continue to serve othe… In real life

Relationships are hard work unless you’ve preemptively announc… that you’re quitting but staying on as a volunteer

We used to have the haves and the have nots But then the haves were further subdivided into the haves and the have to

Those who were once just foaming at the mouth have been rebooted by social media… fomenting at the mouth

Women are attracted to men who tak… Because it’s the best possible clu… That he would risk his life for he…

If you’re going to take sick leave… take FMLA

If you give people enough space You’ll be amazed By their flexibility If you give people enough cyberspa… You’ll be aghast

War is hell, but be– ing conquered is hell on Earth which makes it much worse

Like NFL Hall-of-Famer Dick Ve… I’m a Scorpio So, like Coach Vermeil I also tend to cry whenever I spe… About the things that matter most…

An overreaction used to tell you who was guilty Now it’s just another link in

Either like swords all signs have a point Or like the needle of a compass