Hook-up apps have given intimacy all the allure of an oil change

Accustomed to the view from their… the rich had no idea they were fas… a very steep waterfall

Some people are orchids Some people are dandelions Some people like the ugly duckling are orchids who think they’re dand…

Wittgenstein’s fly in the bottle consults the map for directions to find the map

You seem to have caught me in a gr… But it can’t be at all my fault if As you’ll see in the hieroglyph My back is to the cliff Over which the lemmings drift

The soul is like water The body a glass And a dead body is just A glass from which All the water has evaporated

Knowledge is power said the company man of the hour on whom we all soon began to sour for institutional knowledge is dou…

Social media is a dream come true– Finally, I can keep up appearances while letting myself go

Power is the ability To maintain your non-negotiables And the world to come Will arrive when we stop trying To negotiate a new deal with God

Everyone thinks Vladimir and Estr… stay together because they’re both waiting for Godot when really it’s their mutual disdain for Wile E. Coyote

All art’s politi– cal but some art is more re– ligious than others

We crave connection Because we need it But we are addicted to social medi… Because it’s the last thing we nee… Social media mediates attention

The most surprising aspect of the… though perhaps it shouldn’t have b… was the amount of paperwork it gen…

Whereas Mayor McCheese loved reading about himself in the newsp… ex-Mayor McCheese was served with divorce papers

In the old country song When Mac Davis sings “Oh lord it’s hard to be humble When you’re perfect in every way” I always assumed