Summer child, moon daughter
growing up and losing yourself in the process. From a happy child to a tormented woman
I miss her, that little girl who didn’t know no fear, no loneliness, not really.
I miss that feral creature so confident in her skin so sure of her words.
I miss the sun warming my small still untouched body,
giggling at the little bugs that crawled through my feet;
They were so little, my heart was so full, my mind so empty so free of torment.
I recall clearly the moment consciousness brushed my every thought,
how I thought of everything from the grass that pricked my arms to the meaning of life and the purpose of me, a sun warmed child with too big of a mind, unaware of the curse it was.
A little girl happy to write whatever came to mind, not caring of the shortness of time or the second pair of eyes who would judge her every move with icy cruelty.
For then, it was just a big heart with great love for every creature; from ants to sisters, that I had; still to this day I wonder how it was ever possible to fit it in that far gone summer child.
Coldness was a bother back then, it made the flowers hide, the strange unknown moon shine far more times in the sky.
The wind’s freezing touch was not a reminder of me being alive, as for pain, it was washed away in my mothers arms, one kiss for every tear.
Oh if I had known how many tears I would shred not for a skinned knee but for that of a broken heart and an all too loud mind.
Summer child loving the sweetness of the season’s fruit, filling my mouth with it.
In awe of the vastness of life, of how many things are and go far beyond touch.
I was amazed by it, not overwhelmed, not terrified,
not awake every same night asking the moon to please stay with me,
for I don’t want to be alone with the vastness of the world and you silver and cold,
link me somehow with that little happy summer child who some night looked at you and cried;
You see, she wanted the sun to come back and warm her feet,
not knowing years back that same girl would lay awake blanketed by your light.
Long lost summer child, daughter of a mother who was once, long ago a summer child,
sister of every woman, every one of the ones who were,
the ones who are and the ones who will be that same summer child
and will grow to be daughters of the moon,
smothered by the truth of the world and
forever longing for those long gone summer nights, their long lost childish laugh.
